It's clearly been so long since I've written a post that the first thing I did when I got on my site was hit "publish" and there was nothing new to publish. Call me anxious.
I find it interesting that I've had more hits on this blog and more visitors in the past two months of silence, then I did when I was writing consistently. I've never been one for the numbers and I'm always surprised that people come to read the things written within this small space of the internet.
I've been writing less in this space, but more on my facebook page and within Instagram. I love that on Instagram, I can combine photos with short essays or just a few words. And I'm surprised that my facebook page has over 120 likes and that my posts there have reached an audience of 700 or more. Those clearly aren't all my friends, but what happens when friends share a post and you add a couple fun hashtags.
I've been on three book launch teams so far this year. And I find it incredible that the Lord knew that I needed these books this year as much as I believe that my friends and those around me need these books. You may have seen me talk about them on instagram or twitter or facebook. But, I've also been spreading the word by mouth. I've learned the beauty of living in the in between and what it means to praise God even if all my dreams or plans don't work out. I've learned what it means to find the lovely all around me and that the lovely is given by a God who loves me. I'm still learning what it means to be wild and free in Christ. An idea that both excites and terrifies me.
I dreamed in Swahili the other night. It wasn't my whole dream, but kids started speaking to me in Swahili and I spoke back in their language. It was beautiful and wonderful and makes me want to create vocabulary cards all over again.
I've been learning how to better share my faith over the past eight weeks. And within those eight weeks, I've been frustrated with myself in not being more intentional in sharing the Gospel. And I've been reminded that the Gospel needs to be real to me every day. It's the most important thing that has changed my life completely. And I need people to know that.
I've been torn between whether to come back to writing and what to even write at all. I miss this space. I miss the friends here. I miss the community. And while I want all that to grow, I'm afraid of where it might take me also. I've never been good with follow through. I have the hardest time finishing something that I've started. I don't feel like I'm supposed to walk away from this right now, but I don't know where to begin again either.
I've moved into a new house and gained two new roommates. Our house is lovely, sitting in a wonderful neighborhood, where childhood friends still ride their bikes to each other's houses. Where people wave to me when I'm running and dad's play basketball with their sons in the afternoon. I'm finally back in a house with a physical address and not a PO BOX and we have a doorbell that works.
I'm still fascinated with the little things. And so amazed by how I see God working in such big ways through those little things.
I'm right where I've always been, yet farther along at the same time.
Where have you been lately? Have you felt like you've been in the same place for awhile or are you in territory completely new? Let's catch up in the comments below or by e-mailing me!
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